Values as an inspiration to improve your mental health.
Have you ever felt powerless when facing an unfair situation? Have you ever wished you knew what to do when you witnessed an act of discrimination, and then, when you're at home, you're left thinking about what happened and, come up with several answers, but none of them appeared at the right time? Imagine you are at a restaurant having dinner with your childhood best friend. You are enjoying a nice, wonderful evening, but everything changes when the waiter approaches to take your order.
You notice how the waiter ignores and gets annoyed because your companion is not fluent in English. You feel helpless and uncomfortable as you notice, a dinner with a good friend turns into the most awkward moment you've had in a long time. Your friend is embarrassed that he doesn't understand what's going on but notices how much the waiter's attitude has annoyed you.
You try to think it's just a misunderstanding and surely it's better to concentrate on enjoying your dinner. However, you realize that your order takes longer than usual, unapologetically the waiter brings the food incomplete, cold and serves it with displeasure. Inside you there is only potential hell and you feel bad-words and anger wanting to pop out of your eyes. Unable to raise your voice to the waiter, you keep silent and try to eat, but the anger makes you feel a tremendous lump in your throat.
When you get home, you just want to write a review on Yelp or email the manager to file the discrimination complaint, noticing that your friend could not hide their embarrassment and frustration, as well as the contempt of the waiter. You are also overwhelmed with your emotions: you feel anger and helplessness take over. Unknowingly, your mental health is affected by an event that was out of your control.
Deep down you recognize that the right thing to do was to take action in a way that falls in line with your values and upbringing; even though you may not have filed a complaint or exploited anger at the restaurant, your values such as respect and diversity helped you identify that what was happening was not acceptable and they can help you deal with situations in a way that makes you feel proud. Recognizing the importance of values in managing emotions is key to growing your mental health. As you begin to understand that your feelings were expressing your need to fight for your values you can identify what action you can take to rectify the situation.
Maybe it was just a bad day and a ruined dinner. Next time, however, you'll remember that your mental health, as well as taking care of your emotions, and looking out for people you care about are related to the values you believe in and you stand for. Values can drive mental health care. Perhaps, while you could identify yourself in this situation you felt stuck and unsure as to why you did not speak up. Or perhaps your own self-doubt or negative beliefs got in the way and you are not confident that you can fight for your values. If this also relates to you, this can be a sign to contact a mental health professional that can help build your confidence so you can be assertive when you feel you need to. For more information as to how this can help you, call us at 805-278-0799 to find out how these services can help you.
Los valores como inspiración para mejorar tu salud mental.
¿Te has sentido impotente frente a una situación injusta? ¿Has deseado saber qué hacer cuando eres testigo de un acto de discriminación? y luego, cuando estás en casa, te quedas pensando en lo que pasó y se te ocurren varias respuestas, pero ¿ninguna apareció en el momento correcto? Imagina que estás en un restaurante cenando con tu mejor amigo de infancia. Están disfrutando de una velada agradable y tranquila, pero todo cambia cuando se acerca el mesero a tomar la orden.
Notas cómo el mesero ignora y se molesta porque tu acompañante no habla inglés de manera fluida. Sientes impotencia e incomodidad al ver cómo una cena de amigos, se convierte en el momento más incómodo que has tenido en mucho tiempo. Tu amigo se avergüenza al no entender qué pasa pero nota cuanto te ha molestado la actitud del mesero.
Intentas pensar que es sólo un malentendido y seguro es mejor concentrarse en disfrutar la cena. Sin embargo, te das cuenta que tu orden toma más del tiempo habitual, sin disculparse el mesero trae la comida incompleta, fría y la sirve con desagrado. Dentro de tí solo hay un infierno en potencia y sientes que se salen letreros por tus ojos. Incapaz de levantar la voz o increpar al mesero, guardas silencio e intentas comer, pero la ira te hace sentir un tremendo nudo en la garganta.
Al llegar a casa, solo quieres escribir una reseña en Yelp o un correo al manager para presentar la queja por discriminación, al notar que tu amigo no pudo ocultar la vergüenza y frustación, así como el desprecio del mesero. Sientes como la ira e impotencia toman el control. Sin saberlo, tu salud mental se ve afectada por un evento que no era de tu control.
En el fondo reconoces que hacer lo correcto era tomar acción de acuerdo a tus valores y educación; a pesar de no haber presentado una queja o explotar de la ira en el restaurante, los valores como el respeto y la diversidad te hubieran ayudado a enfrentar la situación con moderación y sensatez. Reconocer la importancia de los valores en el manejo de las emociones es clave, para cultivar una buena salud mental.
Quizá fue solo un mal día y una cena arruinada. Sin embargo, la próxima vez recordarás que tu salud mental, así como el cuidado de tus emociones están relacionados con los valores en los que crees. Los valores impulsan el cuidado de la salud mental. Si quieres aprender a tener un óptimo manejo de tus emociones así como recursos para mejorar tu salud mental, recuerda que nuestro grupo de terapistas puede ayudarte y crear juntos un plan a tu medida. Para mayor información no dudes en llamarnos al 805-278-0799 para saber cómo pueden ayudarte estos servicios.
